Cherishing

Right now, in Aussie. So much had happened recently that I realized I'm still lagging behind trying to catch up with the situation. Life these days seem to be so fragile. For one minute we can be looking at someone so dear to you and the next, he/she would had move on to the afterlife. It's all so fragile...


But because of the recent events, I realized that I can't be that jerk I once was. Maybe I should be honest of the facts that happened not too long ago. The reason why I want to clear up my mess is because with each coming day, guilt raise on me and crawl into my soul. I will not twist my story to side myself, these are the facts.


Her name is Andrea, a really sweet humourous girl whose hands I once held. When we got together, it was honey moon period. As time goes by, because of my lack of understanding, I accused her of things that she had never done or held. Such as, having someone else in mind. I doubt her feelings really badly. Though I never once admitted that to her, I will admit that to readers here.


Once, I complained so much about her feelings and doubt it for she only told me that she loved me once. I kept pushing her to the limit, testing her feelings by giving her the straight to the fact "No feelings felt, a break up" thing.


Pestering her for most of her time, demanding attention from her was what I did whenever we go into silence for a few days. I didn't consider her feelings and even accuse her of not giving her best in the relationship. I even flooded her email, handphone and such that to a point, she couldn't take it anymore, a breakup was initiated.


I forgot my words that I had for others when they seek advise from me or whenever they need a listening ear. I always empasize that throughout any relationship, it's only when the girl feels that she had taken enough nonsense, would she summon her courage to say that she can't take it anymore.


Even till the time whereby she wanted the breakup, I wasn't sane enough to realize the mistakes of mine. I even blare at her for not giving her best. It was only after a friend's nagging, arguement and talking that I woke to my sense. His name is Clement. Somehow, I take it that he's part of my inner circle and I think I too own him an apology and thanks for all his lectures that somehow changed me.


You see, there were many underlying things that I had kept from my readers and thinking back on all these just make me feel like a jerk. But I guess it's still my anger management that is a problem. Don't ask me why I have such a post right now cuz I'm feeling alittle mixed up. But at least, an apology will do good, I hope...


Sorry about everything Andrea, sorry that I slandered you and having doubts about you. Take care of yourself there, nothing must happen to you cuz you are still very dear to me...
As much as even if you hate me to the extend that you wanna delete me off all your contact, least, be careful there... haiz


With all my confession, I leave you this vid. Classic but I love (;



Taken from Rap: Love is like the wind, you can't see it but you can feel it...